Disclaimer: Today's post really has nothing to do with physical fitness. But, it does have to do with being fit mentally and in your relationships, which is pretty dang important! Two years ago today I married my best friend. And although two years may not be a lifetime, I will say that Chad and I have come a long way. I've learned a lot about being in a married relationship (trust me, it's different than dating). Here are just a few tips for all your newlyweds out there:
- Choose Your Battles: Would you rather be "right" or would you rather be happy? The most difficult thing that I've learned is learning to suck it up and just apologize. Even when I don't feel like I've done anything wrong, even when I know I'm right. Sometimes it's better to just say "Ok you're right, I'm sorry" than to argue over something that doesn't really matter all that much.
- Bring Up Your "Issues" in Times of Peace: I've learned that when something is bothering me, I should wait until the right time to say something. When I'm tired and cranky and fed up (or when he is), that's not the right time. However, I've found that times when we are relaxed (like walking the dog) seem to be the best times to address my issues. Big or small, I'm composed and able to say exactly what I mean and I know he's open to listening.
- Be Direct: Ask for what you want and mean what you say. Don't beat around the bush thinking your partner can read your mind because they can't. Perfect example: For our first anniversary Chad didn't do anything for me. I was so sad. I assumed he would do something special. This year, starting several months ago, I told him he better do something nice. To make a long story short, he surprised me with a trip to Hawaii :)
- Set Goals Together: It's important to be on the same page, with the same goals in mind. Every New Year, Chad and I set individual goals and goals together as a couple. Throughout the year we will "check- in" with one another. It's so fun to accomplish things together as a couple.
- We are on the Same Team: It's easy to take frustrations out on your other half. After all, on top of his vows, his ability to remain in the country rests with me ( Did I mention Chad's from the UK?) so I know he ain't goin anywhere. However, sometimes we forget that we are on the same team. Chad always want the best for me and I want the best for him.
- Let Your Partner Have Their Own Life: This was a tough one for me, and it still is! When Chad goes out with friends or has a work meeting at a fancy restaurant, I always want to come along. However, it's healthy to let your spouse have their alone time and friend time. This is also true when coming home from work. Let your partner have a few minutes of "cool down" when they come home and don't take it personally if their not ready to chat the second they walk in the door.
I've still got a lot of learning to do but I hope these tips keep you fit in your marriage and can really be applied to all relationships in your life. I love my Chad more than anyone else in the whole world. Happy Anniversary to my husband. I am one lucky girl. Cheers to staying fit (in your relationships), babes! xo
PS. If you care to see more wedding photos, click here to check out my profile on Carat's & Cake.
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